Getwellbean

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

1/24/2006

Two Years. I really didn't think it would be any different than any other day (depressed, intensely lonely, and regretful about everyday that passes -- every day she misses watching them grow up), but I guess it is. Words can't describe it, songs can't explain it. Just a sense of watching your life pass by in an ethereal sort of way. Witnessing but not participating.

Posted by beanbag at 7:56 AM

Two years ago today, our girls were supposed to have "open gym". I decided against it because we had so many things going that day...a party...a silly party to "get ready" for. Looking back, I wish I could've taken the time to pick up Samie from your house and taken the girls to gym in the morning. I'm sure, knowing us, we would've chatted forever before we even left. I've always wondered what coulda/shoulda...if only...

Today, I woke up and had you in my thoughts and prayers. "I'm sorry" never seems to fit nor does it ever feel appropriate.

But please know that with every passing day, you (and the rest of the family) are always in our thoughts and prayers.

God Bless, Kathleen...

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Today, Bean, I have you in my prayers. Every single day since the day I first met you I have prayed for you to get better - to be able to hug your girls again. I'm not giving up on that prayer.

Today, I am saying an extra special prayer for Mike, Samie and Rachie, that they will be given an extra dose of comfort...and hope.

Sending you love and good wishes...

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There comes a time when you need to face the tough reality of this situation. The children suffer due to the selfish needs of one. It's not normal or healthy. The childrens memory of a comatose mother who throws up in public on Halloween, in front of their friends is going to cause them a lifetime of distress. Forcing these memory's on children who don't know any better, is selfish and detrimental to everyones well being. It's fine to hope for a miracle, but only if you grasp the true reality of the situation. Be Well and God bless.

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OMIGOSH. I read about Kathleen daily but don't post comments. I can not resist today. I can not believe that last comment. What a thoughtless person that must be to say something so mean and hateful.

One should NEVER make judgements like that about a situation that they themselves have not had to live within.

I think about Kathleen and her family often although I only know of them virtually via this site. I think Samie and Rachel will grow up with an amazing sense of unconditional love and caring. They will see what it is like to love and support your family NO MATTER WHAT the case is. That is an amazing gift that Mike is giving to his girls via his unending love and caring for Kathleen.

The things that person said would only cause detriment and distress to a shallow person. Mike's girls will be far from shallow and will be able to handle everything that comes at them with strength and dignity.

I could go on and on with how wrong that person is....but I'm too sickened that someone would say that, I can't type.

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"Freind"...unbelievable. How can you know what my children think or feel? I really don't think you can grasp this situation and certainly don't know Samie and Rachie which considering your comment might be a good thing. Please don't rush to judge. Rachie was watching a "scary show" yesterday and went over and hugged her mommy because she needed comfort. Apparently "the childrens" memories of their mother are still strong and her fight to live and return is failing to cause them a lifetime of distress

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I understand that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but I am absolutely outraged by the comment left by "freind."

Who are you to post such hurtful remarks, especially today of all days? The Daveys face "this situation" every day and you can not even begin to fathom the depth of their daily emotions. And just for the record, Bean is not a "situation."

Samie and Rachie are two of the most strongest and loving children I have had to pleasure of watching grow into beautiful young ladies. The brightest candle in their lives was not blown out that fateful day 2 years ago. And it will take far more than a uncompassionate and thoughtless person like you to dim that bright light. These children will remember their mother for the unconditional love that she has for them and for the strength and persistence that she has to stay by their side.

I am so upset by that post! It was just wrong.

Mike, I am so sorry that you have to endure such negativity and ignorance. It is clearly obvious that this "freind" has no grasp of the true dynamics of your family and do not know your girls at all. Ugh! Totally unbelievable. hugs, j

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Wow, what a difficult, emotional time this must be for you. I agree that the previous poster was harsh, but in an odd way I understand part of what they were trying to say. As a wife, I would be like Mike is, fighting hard for my husbands recovery, looking for any ray of hope and not letting anyone stand in my way. As a mother; however, if this happened to me ,I would not want my children to live everyday praying for me to wake up and seeing me struggle. Unfortunately, in this life we are usually not given what we want, so I praise you for trying to find your own path for you and your family.

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It is absolutely appalling that someone would think that it is appropriate to post such an insesitive comment on what must be one, if not the toughest day for the Davey family. Coach Davey is one of the most amazing people that I have ever met and the positive attitude that he has kept throughout these tough years is something that I can only hope to emulate. Just as he would never give up on his basketball team, he would never give up on Kathleen. My prayers are with you guys and good luck and god bless!
P.S. Tell Samie and Rachie I said hi!
-CE

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Dear Mike, Kathleen, Sammie and Rachie,
As Mike knows I have dabbled in poetry and this last summer after going to visit your house, with dogs and cats everywhere. Sammie and Rachie running around teaching me baseball I wrote a poem. I cant describe all your family has done for me but this is a good articulation of what i feel and see everytime i am in your house.

Love of your house overwhelms
Every step inside fills you with understanding
Inside truth is declared loud and clear.

Love is real, love is true, love is here.
To a star, a tree, a mouse even you

You can not speak your love with words
Your eyes explain it all to anyone looking
How much you love your family
How you love to hear your childrens tales, no matter the height of them
How much you love your husbands complaints about old anxious students

Whenever I pass through your house
I always feel I've found out the Truth

That love is real, love is true, love can happen
to a pool of water, a grain of sand, or even little old me.

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Hello again from Shari, your "San Jose neighbor" as I've come to call myself. :)

As a faithful reader of Kathleen's old and new websites for almost 2 years, I just wanted to reiterate what so many others have also said: Kathleen (and you all) ARE in my thoughts and prayers. I know it probably sounds trite, but I'm sure you can tell that it is sincere.

I don't know if you still have that list of inspirational/optimistic quotations I compiled and emailed you last year, but if it's handy, I hope you might take a peek. If not, I'd be more than glad to email it again. Just let me know. I don't want to post my personal email address here, but hopefully Blogger is recording it for you (or at least recording my blog name).

"Virtual hugs" to all,
Shari :)

"There is in the worst of fortune the BEST of chances for a happy ending." - Euripides

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Dearest Beaner, Mike, Sammy and Rachie,

thank you for teaching us all how to love, to trust and to hope in God's loving care for each of us. I pray every day for a miracle for you, Beaner. I remember that in the beginnin someone said that Beaner would recover in time but that God was asking faith from the family. I am hanging on to that, and like the nagging widow in the gospel, I will keep pestering and reminding him. Auntie Wendy

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Just over 4 years ago, I met Kathleen...our daughters danced together for OYT. Different age groups but under the same teachers. We traveled to competitions and I must admit, I was a bit intimidated by her beauty so I didn't say too much and she seemed a little shy too. Tutu was our main connection & when I heard about what happened, I couldn't believe it. I have prayed for and thought of you ever since. I read the blog at least weekly and continue to be amazed at your strength and love. (I have even wondered if my husband would do half of what you do...would he have the strength...courage or ability?)

I am compelled to write now just to say that almost 58,000 visits have been made to getwellbean in less than a year. Please don't let one small, insensitive, not-too-bright person (that was mean of me, wasn't it?) who doesn't even know you get you down or limit you from telling us how your life is going. There are so many of us who just simply love you & your family and look to you for info, updates and yes, even inspiration. We never know what life will bring us but there is always pain and suffering, there is always joy, hope and always, always love.

All my best, Kim

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Thanks everyone for the kind words and thoughts. Your feelings and prayers are an inspiration for Bean and I to continue. Your words also demonstrate the extra love that has been showered on the girls and our family since this tragedy took place.

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